Saturday, July 11, 2009

Trannier Than Thou?

I've been online sharing quality time with so many beautiful transladies, on and off since 2005. There's one thing that I have observed time and again, which seems to play a big factor for many of you. It seems like a lot of people in this community ascribe to some kind of trans-heirarchy, where it is deemed that those who are "more trans" are somehow better than those who are "less trans"... does this ring a bell for any of you?

It's like, full-time female is regarded higher than part-time female. Or the more surgeries, is some kind of merit badge compared to those who are non-op. Or the more passable transladies, are somehow better than the less passable... and I am sad to see that some of you even form little cliques around this notion. Some of you try to exclude others who don't live up to your standards of transness. Do you not realize you are all just varying degrees along the same spectrum?

I recently invited a few new members to GenderEvolve, and the first question I got from two of them, "well since I am only part-time, am I qualified to join?". I just want to make it clear to all of you, in my opinion, there is no "better than" or "less than" in this community. I don't regard a post-op transsexual woman as a higher form of human being than a part-time crossdresser. To me, you are all equal, you are all beautiful, it doesn't matter how you manifest your transness.

It seems that some of you are ashamed to admit that you value your male side as much as your female side. It's like you worry that we think your male self is unworthy or repugnant. I'll tell you, for my part, I love males just about as much as I love females. There is nothing more appealing to me than a person who embodies both male and female, and is comfortable with this equation. To me, that shows far more inner balance than someone who rejects one or the other side of themself. I was born female, yet I have a strong male spirit inside of me, and I wouldn't trade him for the world. Embracing the two sides of me is what keeps me whole.

I'd love to see the ladies in this community drop the pretense, and come to embrace each other as equal sisters. To admit, you all have some male in you, no matter how far you try to run from it, or who you shun in the process, it is part of all of you, and it's ok.

I'd love to see this whole trans-heirarchy go by the wayside, and for you to recognize you have too much in common to ostrasize one another based on superficial factors.

What do you think, my beautiful sisters?

Much love,
Michele