Characters
(by Shannon Summers)
In a recent conversation, a good friend referred to Shannon as being a ‘character’. She meant it as a compliment, that the whole of myself is greater than the feminine persona I created. Nonetheless, I was a bit taken aback. I consider girlself to be very real, perhaps as real my guyself. Maybe more so. I found her comment to be a challenge to my sense of self, and it got me thinking.
I suppose in many ways, Shannon is a character. When I first started presenting my girlself to the world, I made a lot of conscious decisions about who Shannon would be as a person. What kind of clothes should she wear? How would she present herself in social situations? Would she be fun loving or conservative? Sassy or demure? Would I incorporate my intellect and ideas into my presentation (I have a masters in science), or would I simply play the ditzy blonde role?
These, I felt, were important decisions, comparable to the identity crises most teenagers go through. As people, we are defined by such things.
*****
I also started pondering the nature of ‘characters’ in pop culture. One of my favourite pop culture icons is a rocker formerly known as Brian Warner. At one point in time, Brian was described as a shy, sensitive college student majoring in Poetry. He was hardly noteworthy or controversial. When he started up his band, however, Brian adopted the pseudonym Marilyn Manson. His reasons for doing so were not so dissimilar to our own. As the entertainment editor for the school paper, he wanted the opportunity to write reviews about himself.
At first, the persona of Marilyn Manson was little different than Brian himself, a sad poetic clown reminiscent of Alice Cooper. Over time, however, the character of Marilyn evolved. Brian began incorporating more of his ideas and images into the act, ranging from pop culture affections (even his name is an amalgamation of supermodels and serial killers) to his distaste for his strict Christian school upbringing. This, of course, sparked a firestorm of criticism (mostly from the religious right), which served as a catalyst, forcing him to refine the character of Marilyn with greater clarity and purpose.
Nowadays, friends say they can no longer see Brian Warner in Marilyn, that he has been entirely subsumed into the character. In fact, Marilyn takes great offense being referred to by his former name, saying, “I earned my name. I earned the right to be called Marilyn Manson. It’s not like I’m Brian Warner in the closet and wear my Marilyn mask when people can see me.”
*****
I’m also a huge comic books fan, and it’s hard not to notice the similarities between comic book characters and tgirls. In addition to the secret identities and double life, there are the secretive costume changes, the larger than life personalities, and the enhanced sense of empowerment. We simply are more powerful as gurls. Oh, and the fact that I can still pull off a head high roundhouse kick in 4” heels doesn’t hurt either. Hahaha.
Spiderman has long been the marquee character of Marvel comics, and the strength of any Spiderman story is his alter ego, Peter Parker. Petey was the protagonist that all comic book fans could identify with. He was naïve, bullied, insecure, and just a little too smart for his own good. A smart aleck geek who acted like he knew better because, well, he always did.
As Spiderman, however, Peter became powerful. Inwardly, he was still the same, but no longer was he content with a mere wry smirk to himself. Now his insights were manifest, an in-your-face taunt to the villains, often driving them over the edge and into his ready hands. Over time, the character of Peter Parker changed, as it became harder to hide his growing confidence and personal strength. Even when walking along in street clothes, he knew who he was. He was Spiderman. No amount of costuming could ever change that.
*****
Throughout the course of my life, I have been very blessed to have known quite a few people who could only be described as ‘characters’. Quirky oddball sorts who made no effort to fit into mainstream society; in fact, they gave up trying a long time ago. My life has been enriched by each of them in many ways.
People prefer it when we fit into the preconceived notions. It makes life easier for them, simpler to understand. Thus, we live in a world of judgment and expectation, and the march of conformity continues unabated. Even in our own little community, there are social pressures to conform, to fit into the standard model of what a ‘true’ transgender person is supposed to be. We have norms of expected behaviour, and people who are all too ready to communicate and enforce those expectations.
We hear it all the time, and I find the concept to be so diminutive. To be a ‘true’ TS you have to be x, or you should be y because that’s what ‘real’ women are like. Well, it’s occurred to me that there’s diversity within the female population. Not all women are the same. Some are dainty and proper; others are wild, fun, and out of control. Likewise, even in our own community, should we also not allow for the same tolerance of individual differences? Not all are going to fit into the same mold. Why should they? That’s what makes each of us special and different.
So in answer to the question, is Shannon a ‘character’? Gawd, I certainly hope so.
In a recent conversation, a good friend referred to Shannon as being a ‘character’. She meant it as a compliment, that the whole of myself is greater than the feminine persona I created. Nonetheless, I was a bit taken aback. I consider girlself to be very real, perhaps as real my guyself. Maybe more so. I found her comment to be a challenge to my sense of self, and it got me thinking.
I suppose in many ways, Shannon is a character. When I first started presenting my girlself to the world, I made a lot of conscious decisions about who Shannon would be as a person. What kind of clothes should she wear? How would she present herself in social situations? Would she be fun loving or conservative? Sassy or demure? Would I incorporate my intellect and ideas into my presentation (I have a masters in science), or would I simply play the ditzy blonde role?
These, I felt, were important decisions, comparable to the identity crises most teenagers go through. As people, we are defined by such things.
*****
I also started pondering the nature of ‘characters’ in pop culture. One of my favourite pop culture icons is a rocker formerly known as Brian Warner. At one point in time, Brian was described as a shy, sensitive college student majoring in Poetry. He was hardly noteworthy or controversial. When he started up his band, however, Brian adopted the pseudonym Marilyn Manson. His reasons for doing so were not so dissimilar to our own. As the entertainment editor for the school paper, he wanted the opportunity to write reviews about himself.
At first, the persona of Marilyn Manson was little different than Brian himself, a sad poetic clown reminiscent of Alice Cooper. Over time, however, the character of Marilyn evolved. Brian began incorporating more of his ideas and images into the act, ranging from pop culture affections (even his name is an amalgamation of supermodels and serial killers) to his distaste for his strict Christian school upbringing. This, of course, sparked a firestorm of criticism (mostly from the religious right), which served as a catalyst, forcing him to refine the character of Marilyn with greater clarity and purpose.
Nowadays, friends say they can no longer see Brian Warner in Marilyn, that he has been entirely subsumed into the character. In fact, Marilyn takes great offense being referred to by his former name, saying, “I earned my name. I earned the right to be called Marilyn Manson. It’s not like I’m Brian Warner in the closet and wear my Marilyn mask when people can see me.”
*****
I’m also a huge comic books fan, and it’s hard not to notice the similarities between comic book characters and tgirls. In addition to the secret identities and double life, there are the secretive costume changes, the larger than life personalities, and the enhanced sense of empowerment. We simply are more powerful as gurls. Oh, and the fact that I can still pull off a head high roundhouse kick in 4” heels doesn’t hurt either. Hahaha.
Spiderman has long been the marquee character of Marvel comics, and the strength of any Spiderman story is his alter ego, Peter Parker. Petey was the protagonist that all comic book fans could identify with. He was naïve, bullied, insecure, and just a little too smart for his own good. A smart aleck geek who acted like he knew better because, well, he always did.
As Spiderman, however, Peter became powerful. Inwardly, he was still the same, but no longer was he content with a mere wry smirk to himself. Now his insights were manifest, an in-your-face taunt to the villains, often driving them over the edge and into his ready hands. Over time, the character of Peter Parker changed, as it became harder to hide his growing confidence and personal strength. Even when walking along in street clothes, he knew who he was. He was Spiderman. No amount of costuming could ever change that.
*****
Throughout the course of my life, I have been very blessed to have known quite a few people who could only be described as ‘characters’. Quirky oddball sorts who made no effort to fit into mainstream society; in fact, they gave up trying a long time ago. My life has been enriched by each of them in many ways.
People prefer it when we fit into the preconceived notions. It makes life easier for them, simpler to understand. Thus, we live in a world of judgment and expectation, and the march of conformity continues unabated. Even in our own little community, there are social pressures to conform, to fit into the standard model of what a ‘true’ transgender person is supposed to be. We have norms of expected behaviour, and people who are all too ready to communicate and enforce those expectations.
We hear it all the time, and I find the concept to be so diminutive. To be a ‘true’ TS you have to be x, or you should be y because that’s what ‘real’ women are like. Well, it’s occurred to me that there’s diversity within the female population. Not all women are the same. Some are dainty and proper; others are wild, fun, and out of control. Likewise, even in our own community, should we also not allow for the same tolerance of individual differences? Not all are going to fit into the same mold. Why should they? That’s what makes each of us special and different.
So in answer to the question, is Shannon a ‘character’? Gawd, I certainly hope so.
Comments
In my case "Dee" is not a different persona...I am me and Dee is me. At the same time I am able to express myself more fully and holistically as Dee. I don't feel some of the inhibitions I may have as my male alter ego and I definitely speak my mind more honestly and freely. Something that interests me is that I am living and behaving as Dee in the manner that my astrology chart says I need to develop into.
Am I a character? Not in terms of being substantially different or playing a character actor role.
Is there anything wrong with being a character? Absolutely not. I see no problem with people using this side of them to explore different aspects and characteristics.
I also agree with you that we, as a community, should allow for tolerance and acceptance of individual characteristics and styles. We are all individuals with our own individual and unique characters and outlook on life. That should be encourages and accepted...let's face it, that's what makes people and the world interesting.
That's I before me, except after Dee.....
Character is defined by Oxford Dictionary as:
n. 1. all those qualities that make a person, group or thing what he/she/it is and different from others. 2. a person's moral nature. 3. moral strength. 4. a person, especially a noticeable or eccentric one. 5. a person in a novel or play... "
Characters are unique because they don't fit the common mold; they stand out because they are different. Shannon wants to be a character, not a conformist, even within the scope of the "norms" of the TG community.
I am a character as well, in fact, I am a myriad of characters. I have many facets and social personas, and I decide which to put on depending upon my mood, situation and environment. While my characters may not be as radically different in outer appearance as a M-to-F transition, they are nonetheless each finely crafted and based upon many years of growth and introspection.
I use a certain character for business relations, one that is logical, forthright, unemotional, down-to-earth, diligent, and quite male in demeanor. I have another character that is a fun and flirty party girl who likes to dance the night away. I have a sweet little baby girl character, and yet another who is a commanding dominatrix bitch. I have a spiritual seeker, philanthropist, nurturer character, and I am host to a haughty prima-donna character as well. Ideally my characters would live in total harmony, although regretfully this is not always the case.
I am a character that is being refined continuously as I strive to reach wholeness, totality, completion as a human being. I am more than just Dominess/Michele, yet she is intricately woven into the fabric of myself, and inextricable from the larger me. You are saying that Shannon is a character that has been built quite strategically, rather than a random haphazard compilation of traits resulting merely from circumstance. You are putting conscious thought into developing Shannon as an identity based on aspects of your real self. She is the shell you wear to outwardly express an aspect of your true nature. I can totally relate to this.
I love the creative expression that goes into character building. With the simple changing of external adornments, mannerisms and language, it is possible to switch between the choice of a huge spectrum of available personas. We can appear to be whatever we choose to display. Generally it is assumed that our outer shell is a reflection of who we are inside, although this is not always the case. Perception is often deceiving. Many nuances go into building a persona/identity/image, from personal beliefs and preferences, to the social environment and intention of the message.
I enjoyed your examples of characters who transition from the mundane to larger-than-life. In both cases, a process or journey is inherant in the change, with the goal of becoming something much more brilliant than the original self. I can certainly see the parallel between gender transformation and your examples. Your message here is to encourage people to break the mold, and be characters in their own right. You are saying that even within alternative communities there can still be "mainstream" judgementalism, expectation and pressure to conform. You prefer to be a character because you appreciate diversity and creative self-expression.
Thanks again Shannon, I really enjoyed reading your thoughts on this interesting topic.